The month of August in my home is all about Birthdays.
So what presents do they need?
The other three members in my family are all born in this August. I have thought hard about gifts to give, and even received an email from my daughter Milla titled “18th Wishlist.”
So what is it that my family needs for their Birthdays?
In reality, the biggest gift you can give is to be absolutely present. When you’re worrying about whether you’re hopeful or hopeless at choosing the best gift that they will like. Being optimistic about what Milla would like for her 18th, or what Remy would like for his 22nd Birthday. And then there is Andy, my husband, where do you start there in selecting something that he would like or needs.
At this age, there is no real need for anything. So gratitude turns what we have into enough. We all have an abundance of things to be grateful for and being there for others doesn’t require an abundance of gifts.
The simple and carefully thought out words
The main thing is that you’re showing up. That you’re here and that you’re finding a simple card with words that have been thought out and not just scribbled down. It is picking up the phone and calling, not sending a text.
Birthdays come around once a year, it is a time to celebrate the “Labour of Love” that created and brought you into this world.
Working in clinic with women who are trying to conceive it is important they are present. Because having your head miles away, and your smartwatch on that vibrates with messages and emails doesn’t allow you to be present.
Presence is support
This can be a rocky road, that can feel like your walking alone. I remind people that are supporting those going through this process that there is one thing in the world where you can be anything, and that is to be kind and be present wholeheartedly. Because you never really know how strong you are, until strong is your only option. For some, the loss that comes hand in hand with fertility can be heartbreaking. The time spent waiting, is this going to be a positive or a negative outcome? so being present with your loved ones at this time is important.
Be true to yourself and those around you
When you are fully present, life is abundant with all that you need or want. Meeting eye to eye with a loved one, or catching a glimpse of the changes on your child’s face as they reach a milestone. To be true to yourself and those around you is to be present.